nouvelle vie

useless.

2010-07-16T16:52:00.003+08:00

How useless can one get? Be ME and u'll know and experience it totally.

Job hunting to no avail. wow.
yeah..job replies. like only the job of a pathetic job recruiter?
so much so for studying.

never felt so useless before. totally.
i guess i pretty much screwed my uni life. and yeah. my results.

now. serve me right.

fml.

need a reply.

2010-07-01T16:41:00.002+08:00

Out of the many sent, pls. let at least one reply and get back.
It's getting demoralizing with each passing day.

I want to get out. pls let me do.

-sick n tired of life-

mess.

2010-06-14T16:34:00.002+08:00

my life's in a total mess.
it may look good. comfortable life or wad not.

i'm going berserk with each passing day.
it's driving me crazy.

n what's still holding me, giving me support is u, bb girl.

-do not judge like you fcuking know me, when the fact, u know nothing-

a million issues

2010-05-26T13:17:00.001+08:00

a million issues, suffocating me. i seems to lose my listening ears.

Do what u think it's worth , being a friend?

2010-04-16T18:42:00.001+08:00

come on. do not do what u don't want others to do on u.

-wtf are friends abt? wtf are friends for?-

我怀念的

2010-04-06T00:33:00.002+08:00

我怀念的是无话不说
我怀念的是一起做梦
我怀念的是争吵以后

还是想爱你的冲动。。

the power of the word-of-mouth.

2010-03-04T01:38:00.002+08:00

the power of the word-of-mouth..is simply terrifying, it has the ability to simply shatter stone into teeny wheeny pieces. this is absolutely unbelieveable.

Dare to doubt me if u really know me. if you don't. simply fuck off.
I cant believe how pathetically some ppl can be. even if names were not called, i believe i would know who's that few.

It simply make me lose faith in one.totally.

Everything apart. I just hope..this time i'll come up with a viable doable profitable business idea soon. I'll strive towards my goals and make it happen.
I must. I need to.

-If u never did believe in me, don't call me a friend. just tell me to fcuk off-

it's not being emo.it's being grateful.

2010-02-11T21:17:00.004+08:00

**跟我說 : 哥哥(你)是一個好男人 ..i really miss them.

it's great to know people you once cared for do think of you.

-if i was even given a chance, believe me. i would.-
甘心替代你..

2010-02-08T23:08:00.001+08:00

你的回話凌亂著.在這個時刻.我想起噴泉旁的白鴿. 甜蜜散落了. 情緒莫名的拉扯. 我還愛你吶. 而你斷斷續續唱著歌. 假裝沒事了. 時間過了走了. 愛情面臨選擇. 你冷了倦了我哭了. 離開時的不快樂. 你用卡片手寫著. 有些愛只給到這真的痛了. 怎麽了.你累了.說好的.幸福吶我懂了.不說了.愛淡了.夢遠了開心與不開心.一一敘說著.你在不捨那些愛過的感覺都太深刻.我都還記得你不等了.說好的.幸福吶我錯了.淚乾了.放手了後悔了只是回憶的音樂盒還旋轉著. 要怎麼停呢你的回話凌亂著. 在這個時刻. 我想起噴泉旁的白鴿. 甜蜜散落了. 情緒莫名的拉扯. 我還愛你吶. 而你斷斷續續唱著歌. 假裝沒事了. 時間過了走了. 愛情面臨選擇. 你冷了卻了我哭了. 離開時的不快樂. 你用卡片手寫著. 有些愛只給到這真的痛了. 怎麽了.你累了.說好的.幸福吶我懂了.不說了.愛淡了.夢遠了開心與不開心.一一敘說著.你在不捨那些愛過的感覺都太深刻.我都還記得你不等了.說好的.幸福吶我錯了.淚乾了.放手了後悔了只是回憶的音樂盒還旋轉著. 要怎麼停呢 ..

-it's just another day in the 365days, it's once in my 26years, no longer looking forward, nor do i need any celebrations-

a new direction in life

2010-02-02T15:25:00.004+08:00

i need a light. i need a direction in life.
It's something im currently lacking in my life.

The current me. is not what i want to be. N definetly i see no future in this pathetic soul.

Another week it will be. The first one after 5years.
It's just something im not looking forward to. Be it because of the fact that when ppl gets older, they tend to not celebrate it anymore, or be it the fact that it's gonna be the first one since a long time that i'll be "celebrating" this alone.

Thinking back, she made me felt like a movie star when my pictures appeared on the large plasma screen at the building of hmv, orchard. It's something that i rather she not waste her money doing it, but it was something that really touched me. the efforts she put in. it made me feel so special. But it's all torn apart. 120709.

As what i said before, the surprise. got surprised.
It's how it ended. Till now, it's kept that way.

-emotions are not sought for, it comes from within. Sometimes, it's better off being a heartless one.-

is it worth the effort

2010-02-01T12:27:00.004+08:00

Osim. It's this little conversation i had today with a pal that just sets me thinking.

"but thinkin back..without u..things will be so much diff..if..."

It's the little things people do n how they reciprocates to one's efforts. importantly, it's people whom u care for. friends.

This friend of mine was just mentioning to me about some incident that happened. He felt disappointed being taken for granted despite being friends for some time..n after he just stated this."im sure u feel this hundred times more than me". I was taken aback. I've never really thought of this. but somehow it did hit me.

I'm not asking for anything in return. but neither do i want to be taken for granted. It's sad to know that when i was not around in sg, none bothered to organise the usual friday meetups. be it a simple dinner or so. It's something i did hope that will happen when i left sg.

I mean Come On, issit that i really need the meetup? issit really me being the only one who's looking forward to meetup with THE friends? Im sure i will always turn up for any of the gatherings that any of our peeps organise. It's not that im so into wadever activities the then organiser proposed, it's the little support to give to someone who actually bothers doing something for the group. Isn't this kinda heard/seen alot of times? "It's not the activities that matter, it's the group of people u are with." But. how true is this in actual life.

He mentioned that the bond among our group seems to be fading away..n i definetly agrees to that. But what can i do.

Every friday, i'll try to keep this bond alive, by organising meetups. be it dinner + wadever activities after. Yes, if u had not notice, the thought of doing wad after dinner actually kills me each week. Yes, and many would say "who ask u ask so many people, everyone also jio."

Yes, i chose to send smses to abt 30people each week. inviting them to join us for the activities.

It's just like taking my own hand and slapping my own face.

Take a few minutes, if not just a few seconds, to think about this. "It's not a badge, it's a family crest."
It's the reason why i chose to waste my sms . sending to all peeps in the team.
As according to him, if i didnt invite the rest of the peeps in the team to join us, would the bond be as strong like now. i really don't know.
I'm sure many of those who had organised the meetups before have told me that they would get damn Sians. when they receive lotsa -ve replies..the trouble of thinking what to do after dinner.
Did you ever put ureself in my shoes ..i always get that kinda negative replies. it oversurge the +ve replies normally. do u not think i'll feel disappointed as well. being the one doing it in n out each week. And at times, the response i get during the meetups is like "eh, organiser, so doing wad after dinner." "eh organiser, so little people ah?".

Perhaps u may see this as a ranting part of mine, or rather the usual "emo" tag many loves to put on me. Many would also take me as a joker. But no.
It's just something i wish everyone can take a little of their time to think about, if, this so called friendship/bond is important to you.

-the word sick is an understatement when it's fitted into my life-

突然好想你

2010-01-29T17:40:00.001+08:00

最怕空气突然安静
最怕朋友突然的关心
最怕回忆突然翻滚
绞痛着不平息
最怕突然听到你的消息

想念如果会有声音
不愿那是悲伤的哭泣
事到如今
终於让自已属於我自已
只剩眼泪还骗不过自己

突然好想你
你会在哪里
过的快乐或委屈
突然好想你
突然锋利的回忆
突然模糊的眼睛
我们像一首最美丽的歌曲
变成两部悲伤的电影
为什麽你带我走过最难忘的旅行
然后留下最痛的纪念品

我们那麽甜那麽美
那麽相信那麽疯
那麽热烈的曾经
为何我们还是要奔向各自的幸福和遗憾中老去

突然好想你
你会在哪里过的快乐
或委屈突然好想你
突然锋利的回忆突然模糊的眼睛
最怕空气突然安静
最怕朋友突然的关心
最怕回忆突然翻滚绞痛着不平息
最怕突然听到你的消息

-最怕此生已经决定自己过没有你却又突然听到你的消息-

blink of an eye

2010-01-22T13:46:00.003+08:00

just strucked me. its been 224.

for the past 5years, its always pleasant to be celebrating it with the special one. be it with the peeps or without.

in a blink of an eye. 5years passed by, 224 has too.

-so not looking forward to it this year-

drink drank drunk.

2010-01-16T13:28:00.002+08:00

my first experience drinking . n getting drunk. to the extent that i don't rem how i got home. my friend who came back and said hi. did i even manage to walk after? i don't recall !
damn.
this is bad. and the hangover now is killing me..
head spinning.
think it was really the heaviest dosage of liquor i took in my entire life.
totally.

-never ever a second time-

misses

2010-01-11T14:23:00.004+08:00

i've no idea what is this life about for now..but certainly, deep within, there's still an emotion inside me, misses,missed,missing.
I wished it was like what he said, 6mths is all that you need. it's beyond that period.
Perhaps i feel lost. right now. and that emotion is building all over me.

I'm missing you.

i miss having that someone right by my side.
i miss having that someone complaining abt my passion for soccer n going down for every sun matches.
i miss having that someone asking me to bring baobao along whenever heading out.
i miss having that someone to play mj with, together with my mum, the laughter we share.
i miss having that someone to send back all e way back be it in the middle of the night.
i miss having that someone to buy me each and every jay chou's album whenever it's released.
i miss having that someone to listen to her and sing the jay chou's album and putting one song on a repeat mode for the whole journey back home.
i miss having that someone to attend all our peeps gathering together.
i miss having that someone to look at the cute little way she throws the bowling ball.
i miss having that someone to wait for while she attends to her customers.
i miss having that someone complaining abt me eating durian and says that it stinks and not to open my mouth.
i miss having that someone who was willing to come all the way down to the city area just to meet me for lunch.
i miss having that someone with me for all my overseas trip.
i miss having that someone packing my luggage for me whenever we head overseas.
i miss having that someone to give her surprises and that expression thereafter on her face that means everything would be worth doing.

yet now, i have missed the chance to spend the rest of my life with that special someone.

-life is all about cherishing what you have, before you lose it. It's all over-

New year resolution 2010

2010-01-06T16:47:00.001+08:00

I need $$$ , i need to make more money! i need to get started!

Procrastinate no more.

-better new year resolutions to come-

Breathing

2010-01-04T14:08:00.002+08:00

I'm finding my way back to sanity again
Though I don't really know what I'm going to do when I get there
Take a breath and hold on tight, spin around one more time
And gracefully fall back to the arms of Grace'

Cause I am hanging on every word you say and
Even if you don't want to speak tonight that's alright, alright with me'
Cause I want nothing more than to sit outside Heaven's door
And listen to you breathing, is where I want to be, yeah
Where I want to be

I'm looking past the shadows in my mind into the truth and
I'm trying to identify the voices in my head,
God which one's you?
Let me feel one more time what it feels like to feel alive
And break these calluses off of me, one more time'
Cause I am hanging on every word you say and
Even if you don't want to speak tonight that's alright, alright with me'
Cause I want nothing more than to sit outside your door
And listen to you breathing, is where I want to be, yeah

I don't want a thing from you
Bet you're tired of me waiting for the scraps
To fall off your table to the ground'Cause I just want to be here now'
Cause I am hanging on every word you say and
Even if you don't want to speak tonight that's alright, alright with me'
Cause I want nothing more than to sit outside Heaven's door
And listen to you breathing, is where I want to be, yeah'
Cause I am hanging on every word you say and
Even if you don't want to speak tonight that's alright, alright with me'
Cause I want nothing more than to sit outside Heaven's door
And listen to you breathing, is where I want to be, yeah
Where I want to be
Where I want to be

what am i?

2010-01-04T13:24:00.004+08:00

there has been many breakups in the year 2009. it is a bad year for r/s. at least for the loved ones around me...i've seen many breakups..many. mine inclusive.

It had been a longlong 5 years for me and her..at least to me. it was long enough...for me to even have the idea of settling down, hoping to build with her the world's bestest family ..
Many have said " long r/s wouldnt last till marriage, it's the one that u get together with during the age when ppl are ready to get married, that's the one u will marry with"
I always beg to differ..but now the reality is making me witnessing the harsh facts by the evolution of mankind's view of a r/s. Not that i am divine. The past p/s has also proved me wrong..so wrong. It shattered me..deep within, to now..i identify myself as someone who's not capable of giving another one..the kinda bf that the venuz-es would seek to have.

But what kind of bf am i.
I chose to give in whenever there's a quarrel, be it her fault/mine. not immediately, but after awhile, i'll just be the one picking the phone. yes, perhaps this is what others will call weak.

Whatever kind of food she wants to eat, i'll try to accomodate, i'll try to like what she likes.

Whatever model of car she prefers, i would hold back on my own choice and think twice abt it .

I would bid the carplate no. of mine to be our anniversary date.

I would try to make our anniversaries a special one. monthsaries with little surprises as long as i can think of any. It's literally down to nothing much that i can give as a gift.

I would tell her no, its too expensive and shouldnt buy it..when she sees something she loves. and get it for her for our anniversary or any other special occasions.

I would want to make her the 全世界最辛福的人 . . . .by kneeling down and asking for her hand.

-love ought to be sweet, everlasting, not dependent on just when it starts-

finally back.

2010-01-03T01:23:00.002+08:00

had a bbq and im killed.
in great pain while i type this now. i guess some of the food they did was not cooked afterall.
anyone knows what's the cure? i just simply popped a few panadols to ease the pain. but doesnt seems to help.

my brother's back and im now in my own room...it's been 6mths 22days since i on the aircon of my room. step into it. stayed here for more den 30mins. lying on my bed in pain.
i wished u're here. cause i know u'll be here when i needed someone..

-physically aching , yet shattering and deepening the wound further within-

a special day? not anymore.

2009-12-30T12:00:00.002+08:00

Just as i was chatting to friends about what's their plans for countdown parties. I just couldnt rem what i usually do for countdown parties to the new year.

Perhaps it's the holding back. My brain cells just simply wanna me forget abt it. not to recall anything. but now i rem, It's the special day of that special someone that belongs to me for the past 5years. It's her birthday..

Yes, for most of the 5years, i have been busy days way before 31st to prepare for her birthday present,surprises n what not. N yups. a few of this have been spent overseas together like korea and bangkok..

This year , it's different..it's all bound to what i want to do, alone. It's all up to me. no longer two.
But be it. i just wanna wish that all her wishes will come true n i reallyreally hope..that, which is what she chose. will really be the best for her. really do.

-please, if there's any endings that will be tormenting to her, just strike it upon me for it really doesn't make much of a diff to me right now-

empty

2009-12-25T02:48:00.003+08:00

the moment it ended. staring across the empty space. for a moment, i realised i was alone..there was no one i could look across at..it's amazing how different i felt. it's been 5 great years ..for now, it's different.

it's a life i have no directions to look at . or perhaps i don't know where to start to drive towards too..

i really gotta say....a plan of settlement the following year was what i had looked forward to. a resolution for the year 2009. . stepping towards year 2010. i seems to be left with nothing, just nothing at all.

it's not a post of emotional thoughts, it comes within, for the least at this instance.

i envy u guys. i do. i really do. It's tormenting .

i have been classified as one with character flaws, perhaps i only know how to give. but not giving out the quality that's been seeked for. Have i really not done enough. Do i really not know how to treat one right.

For many of my pals, they are the cream of the crops coming from the mars' category. I am the opposite. just the direct opposite

-i will make it right, if there's ever a chance of returning back to the past-

im back to reality.

2009-12-20T18:12:00.002+08:00

im back from all the trips. end of journey.
countless photos, immense memories.

im hit hard, the moment i stepped upon my empty house.
feelings which i dunno how to pen down. i missed my parents, my family.
definetly, i realised the meaning of "cherishing only when u lose it."

facebook-ed.msn-ed.gazed upon the dark empty sky.im lost totally.
what am i ..? really. is there any true friends who will wish to tell me what i am?
i know im a failure in life. i don't think im e least bit of any value. i don't wanna say this , i don't wish that this is the truth. but i really gotta admit now. i suck. i suck in everything.
do i now even have a passion . i really don't know.

-am i reaching another bottom pit, i cant even seems to control my emotions anymore. tearing upon an empty promise made-

galore

2009-12-14T21:22:00.002+08:00

another 2days before im back in sg again..time really flies huh. it's alrdy been 3 weeks since im down under and nz's trip just pass by that quickly.

memories flashes pass many a times. im confused.

nightmare galore. pls spare me this tonight. i just wanna have a good rest.

-are memories really meant to be kept, or at times, one really ought to know when to let go-

Rx8. my love

2009-11-22T18:18:00.004+08:00

Rx8 my love.

Time flies. in a blink of an eye. its 6years.

Today's the last, it just gives me the feeling that another of my loved one is parting with me.

Yeah.there's a new one coming, but if i am given the chance. weighing the pros and cons. i will definetly love to keep u.

It's saddening. I don't want tomorrow to come.

listener.

2009-11-13T14:03:00.000+08:00

a bucket. a pair of ears. i wished for.

don't let me go

2009-11-12T14:36:00.002+08:00

And I'd give up forever to touch you'
Cause I know that you feel me somehow
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be
And I don't want to go home right now
And all I can taste is this moment
And all I can breathe is your life'
Cause sooner or later it's overI just don't want to miss you tonight
And I don't want the world to see me'
Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming
Or the moment of truth in your lies
When everything feels like the movies
And you bleed just to know you're alive
And I don't want the world to see me'
Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
And I don't want the world to see me'
Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
And I don't want the world to see me'
Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am

-efforts , i felt it through the pages, as i reminisce, droplets flew, promise was shattered-

a new chapter of life.

2009-11-09T02:52:00.003+08:00

i will be missing u.. brought me so many sweet memories.
was given a choice..i really hope it won't be a wrong one.
sorry

a new chapter of life will start on 231109.

-as each day passes by, my heart seems to sink deeper-

drastic change. a point made so clear.

2009-11-05T01:43:00.002+08:00

total change. a point that's made so clear. yet i harbour other thoughts. to double/triple confirm.

a harmless joke ended it all.

-putting it across, taken me aback-

revolver.

2009-11-01T05:14:00.002+08:00

life just simply revolves around.
do not mind if mine revolves around ures if there's the least bit of reciprocation.

Its just the feeling of being taken for granted. It kills. Whoever u are , reading, u won't know.
N that's why the word E is being constantly whined that its getting utterly disturbing.

-Do not judge me, even if u think you know-

Pleasant surprise!

2009-10-29T16:05:00.002+08:00

Caramel frapp! that made my day. hahah.
=))))))))))))))))))))))))

silly me.

2009-10-29T01:48:00.002+08:00

setting alarm .awaking just to check your mobile.
silly isnt it.

Crazy day. crazy night.

2009-10-28T02:36:00.003+08:00

A crazily tiring day. yet with another crazy night. but really an enjoyable one.

Haven't had this crazily happening night for ages. Though short. but enjoyable. really had a great time.

If only times were like this. or rather can be like this.

pilots.

2009-10-23T14:02:00.002+08:00

i realised i never thought of being a pilot for i hate ppl who flies a plane.

New weekly routine to be in place. i rather have a stay home weekend.

Don't bother doing it for there are always so many sudden realisations.

Don't ever tell me off if i ever start flying a plane, for i've not done it to anyone before.

-Why do i even fucking care-

$$$$$______$$$$$

2009-10-19T16:17:00.003+08:00

First time ever in my life see-ing such crazy amt of cold hard cash. It just makes me go.. $$$___$$$

Wonder when will i ever be able to earn such an amt of money. How many years will it take me.
Damn . Im freaking broke.

Need to save up for my current wants.
- A digicam
- Ps 3 Slim
- A pair of shades

-BONUS PLS!-

Move on

2009-10-15T14:57:00.002+08:00

Had a great meet up with mich, great lunch(hock lam beef noodles FINALLY), great conversation. Haha close to 3hrs lunch is no joke. luckily dad was napping when i got back. haha =x

-if u walk and hit a rock, u can stand and ponder wth am i so blur not to see it, or u can just take that bloody rock and throw it as far as possible n say u can only hit me once and so Fcuk off~-

moodless

2009-10-14T11:22:00.001+08:00

Dark clouds gathered, raining dogs and cats .
Another sleepless night, wondering when will e sky be cleared.

-spare me-

fucked.

2009-10-13T23:18:00.001+08:00

crashed, upon knowing this.

its been awhile. fuck my life. n get a life.

-i don't know the reason for feeling this way when e ending told me not to-

shld i carry on

2009-10-12T00:44:00.002+08:00

yet again we collapsed. albeit a better fight in e first half.

Perhaps some may have realised, the "collapse" of the team spirit in the game..somehow started off..together with sz stepping down. and me. to lead the team.

I tried to give my best shot. To try to lead the team, off and on the pitch. apparently it doesnt work. I do not command the respect as the captain to all the guys, yea.i certainly don't possess such leadership qualities.

It hurts to see my team crumbles every week. really should think abt this.

-What's a shout, it simply makes u feel like a fool in e end-

enough is enough

2009-10-10T03:10:00.001+08:00

such a joke.

to decipher something u wouldn't want to know , guess it hurts the most.

Say it. Mean it.

2009-10-09T16:32:00.003+08:00

Great. Why am i doing this again. sux. arrowing myself yet again.damn.
Supposed to just ask that few who told me they are free and wanna go out.yet ended up thinking..."oh it would be better if i let the rest know of our plans, so they wun feel left out". damn.

And on it goes again. Sms-ing. replying irritating questions like what are we eating, who's coming. who's us? .excessively using my smses which are causing a big hole in my pocket each mth.
GREAT.

Damn u , for u have no control over the words u said.

-Get a life-

To go or not to go?

2009-10-08T16:47:00.002+08:00

inspired to start. yet barriers seems too huge an amt to overcome.

To start or not to start.

-nothing ought to be impossible,yet-

Over you

2009-10-02T17:42:00.000+08:00

Now that it's all said and done,I can't believe you were the one
To build me up and tear me down,Like an old abandoned house.
What you said when you leftJust left me cold and out of breath.
I fell too far, was in way too deep.
Guess I let you get the best of me.

Well, I never saw it coming.I should've started running A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you, I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.
I'm slowly getting closure.I guess it's really over.I'm finally getting better.
And now I'm picking up the pieces.I'm spending all of these yearsPutting my heart back together.'
Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,I got over you.

You took a hammer to these walls,Dragged the memories down the hall,Packed your bags and walked away.
There was nothing I could say.
And when you slammed the front door shut,
A lot of others opened up,So did my eyes so I could see that you never were the best for me.

Well, I never saw it coming.I should've started running a long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without youMore than you, more than you know.I'm slowly getting closure.I guess it's really over.
I'm finally getting better.And now I'm picking up the pieces.
I'm spending all of these years putting my heart back together.
'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through, I got over you.

New change.

2009-10-01T02:31:00.003+08:00

Just came back from my first ever guitar lesson with vishnu at allist's place. He's really nice to fork out time to teach us. and he's really patient to teach someone like me, with no music background. Thanks dude~ much appreciated.

Inspired by his musical talent, im determined to be able to play a piece of my own soon. how soon. ha depends on how fast my fingers can get over the blisters and be more flexible.

After which, met up with an old friend. a great catchup after such a long time. hmmm.really glad to be meeting old friends whom i have not talked to for long.
When i dropped her off, she left something on her seat. It was a gift. a nicely decorated packet which i thought initially was a packet of sweets. But! when i got home..i saw there's a card. a popper, a packet of wet tissue and a nicely decorated card.
It reads

-To pop away your troubles
-to cool yourself down when you feel so heated up
-to remain cheerful against adversity
-加油！

It's really really sweet . thanks pal! i really really appreciate it . alot. It's really been long since anything/anyone touched my heart. making me felt. that there's someone out there who actually do care. (although i know u peeps out there care too)

it's just ..well. im determined to change my life.

-a brand new life.-

someone

2009-09-28T19:49:00.002+08:00

i need someone to talk to...someone to share my thoughts.

Why is this nightmare recurring yet again. Spare me the torment. For i am really breaking down.

-crossroad-

Time of my life

2009-09-28T02:23:00.002+08:00

I've been waiting for my dreams
To turn into something i could believe in
And looking for that magic rainbow
On the horizon, I couldn't see it.

Awkward meetup, awkward silence. It's perhaps an awful decison of mine right from the start.

I aint nobody's mr right kinda guy. I feel like im the success of all un-accomplishments.
What right do i have.

I yearn for a simple mind, a simple life

-Chapter's closed-

Over

2009-09-26T19:05:00.002+08:00

dunno who are u guys that are tracking my blog now. for its been dead for really long.

It's been a really week..which i wished i would never have to go thru.
Im really affected. yes i am.

I never expect someone to be able to change. that easily. that drastically.

I guess its over. so don't ask.

-kept myself busy as and when i can, thru e dreams i thought i'll find tranquility, yet. nightmares haunt me for me to yet face reality again-

a way out.

2009-09-22T13:13:00.002+08:00

feel like my life is in a total mess ..or perhaps it had always been but yet to realised.

I need a way out. be it something to lead, or someone to.

Its crazy to not know what you are thinking ..feeling.

-pls lead a way-

gonna miss.

2009-09-19T04:33:00.003+08:00

its 4.33am. yet i cant fall aslp. planned the surprise party for crystal. n im glad she's surprised. and likes the gifts that i chose on behalf of da peeps. love hanging out with this bunch of fun loving ppl. hope she had a great night out with us(haha although i hate e part where all e others have to wait for vickie and her to reach my place..and i seems to be a bad planner where everyone didnt have much to do...apart from just waiting)

She's here. she's gone.

-Without feelings would be good for now. if only-

Priority. or just an option.

2009-09-17T21:22:00.002+08:00

I'm really tired. physically tired. mentally tired. im breaking into pieces.

Do i always have to be the one to be giving. Can this innate liability just go.

Seriously. I cant take it anymore.

-Do not let someone become a priority in your life, when u are just an option in theirs-

i wished.

2009-09-12T03:39:00.002+08:00

just back from the usual friday dinner and bowling game.
It may just seems to be a normal day. a normal game. but i just cant help it.
It came to me. totally tearing me apart. I wished u will know. or even just perhaps take the minimum effort to actually..really ponder abt my feelings. do u. i seriously don't think so.

Its just all abt the impossibilities. the brain over heart. the feelings of all that i would not want it to be. I've tried. have i not? I've tried. but does it really mean a thing ..if it did. it wouldnt be like this.

I wished to be able to talk to someone. to share my deepest inner thoughts. i wished i could.

-Just with this blog. i wished i could sleep myself off like how it is ended up as a shadowed link-

A great weekend. yet not.

2009-09-07T00:44:00.002+08:00

Kicked off the sunday with a disappointment at 7am when yet again the match was called off. till 9am with the call from bu, there was hope, and i started to dial n call up the refugees for some last minute actions. Despite the weather, we had a game. n i really appreciated the 11musketeers who braved the rain and came down. especially those who stays really far away from the pitch. yup. thanks guys. And it was a thumping 7-0 victory. great.Assisted 2(vickie) and scored 2. could easily make it 3...if i chose not to pass it. oh well.its a great game , great team victory.

Spent the later part of the day with a few peeps, and yes. her. Its wad that makes me believe in..its not wad u do.its the person(ppl) u spend ure time with that's really making one to be in a buoyant mood. be it ure an emo kid. < not self declared though.

Spent another 37bucks at the arcade. ha i guess this is the biggest amt of cold card cash i have ever spent at the arcade my entire life. including the previous 2 times.! but well! it was well worth it! the smile on ure face, n the bubbly u .really affected me as well? its great. yup.

Though, getting home...its not the news i wanna end my day off with. not at all.
They don't deserve this. not this kind of ending. Why.
Does it have to be this. for them.? for us.?

-i really don't get it, if only there's an answer to all questions-

Gift!

2009-09-04T16:07:00.002+08:00

a Gift to be kept! till when? no idea.

-never revolve ure life around someone and let him/her be the focus of your life-

Meet up!

2009-09-01T21:12:00.000+08:00

Shortest meet up ever! hm...54mins or so. =\

Back.

2009-08-28T14:32:00.001+08:00

I need a break!

Nothing is as real as a dream. The world can change around you, but your dream will not. Responsibilities need not erase it. Duties need not obscure it. Because the dream is within you, no one can take it away.

It hurts me..

2008-09-20T15:46:00.002+08:00

Sigh...why on earth did this happen to him! my little baobao.darn.

Baby called me yest in e afternoon telling me baobao had grew some little red lumps around his neck area.....got me frantic...In the end baby went down to the vet with my mum as i was still at work.

Its some kind of allergy according to the vet...and when i got home and i saw the condition..it was really bad....Lost his fur around the affected area and it was really reddish.
What me and baby could do was to keep carrying him , massaging him and preventing him from scratching the area so that it won't bleed and get affected...

Just got back from a petshop buying the Elizabeth Collar for him..the cone-alike thingy ppl use for dogs to prevent them from biting ppl. Yes...for him to prevent himself from scratching the area...It's the first time baobao is wearing it and he felt really uncomfy with it.

He's now trying to scratch the wound but at least the collar is useful. However...it means that its really itchy and he cant do anything abt it...scratching to no avail..This really hurts me...he cant even sleep properly ..I was imagining myself that my skin is itchy and im tied up ...how bad is that feeling.....

Prays..pls let baobao recover reallyreally soon.....

Its hurts whenever i look at him..

Embark into a new phase of my life

2008-08-30T15:47:00.005+08:00

Embarking into my new phase of life in 2days time.
Shall be flying over to Penang for training ( what a giam siap place to go to ...darn )
Well..Since this is the last weekend of my freedom, shall do some blogging before i don't even know will i be stepping into this blog once i start work again.

Got a new GF! haha. ok NAH. It's just the new lappie i've got at comex. Thanks to my sweetest mummy !!! Coming with it is my first newly SSS owned camera. Its FREEEEEE! haha.
Nothing stylish about the camera but i guess since its free, its good den. . . (at least its a 8megapixel cam)

Yesterday, which was a friday..tried to organise a dinner at Tao's restaurant but failed as so many negative replies from the peeps..So as suggested by steph, i went for lunch with baby at tao's restaurant instead! haha. As usual..very satisfied with the food and the worker's service attitudes.

Flop of the day: i couldnt catch the movie i wanted to watch since dunno how long ago. "money

no enough 2"

After lunch, it was about 3pm..and the movie was at 3.25pm at PlazaSing, which was near tao's. Drove there in full speed...hoping not to miss any part of the show.
In the end, when i reach the cineplax with enthusiasm and such anxiety that i will be able to get some laughter off the show. DARN IT! The queque was like as though GV was giving out free movie tickets. And did i mention when i check the availability of the tickets 1.5hrs ago at home, it was totally empty. Yet. Now its sold out. WTH. Can see that all those in the queques are students that i presume are all SMU STUDENTS! damn IT!

Feeling disappointed. I used my hp and checked other cineplexes for the movie's timing elsewhere. Saw that Cathay cineleisure had a 4pm timing! I decided to Walk there with baby.(thanks baby!) since i dun wanna pass through the numerous stupid blood sucking ERP again and the paying extra carpark fees as well.

And yeah since its a flop. u guys should know what is happening next. Reached the destination and i was destinated not to be able to catch the show. SOLD OUT. zZZzz.
Therefore..i gave up, took a bus ride back to P.S , took my car and drove to national library since both of us was really tired of all the walking for the whole noon. And also it was because we were gonna meet the peeps for dinner at bugis later at 7pm. Yes, I slept at the library while baby got some of her favourite books.

7pm. Met up with stepH, ry, eddie n the rare Allister~! Dine at bugis foodcourt since it was budget day..
After which we proceeded to our new weekly activity. YES yl said all thanks to me when baby complaint about her nails breaking during the bowling game. I shan't organise any more! arg

Okie, enough said..Time for some pictures..hate doing this.haha..slow uploading ..

New toshiba lappie =)

Delicious tao's restaurant starter!

Fruitty salad! ( oh yes u got choices of like about 5 kinda salads )

Unique way of drinking their nice tea! (mine's Rose Apple tea)

Baby's desert( Choco foundue ) New on menu!

Us!

Me with my desert( Creme Brulee) A MUST TRY!

Baobao and me!

Baby strolling baobao

2Bs!!

My precious~ 4Years and counting.

Side View

Baby and Steph at bowling alley

Steph's bowling Record! cheers! 106!!

Stephanie asking us to check out her top score! haha

Alrite till den...which i dunno when will i be blogging again. ciaoz! =)

Hopefully this new phase of life doesnt stop my weekly outing with da peeps..and of coz my time with baby...

Great for 2, disheartned by 4

2008-08-12T20:39:00.002+08:00

Havent been in the mood for blogging for the past several weeks.
Quite irritated by that fact that i have to upload the pictures one by one onto the blog so that's partly the reason why i haven't been updating this deadly blog.

Btw, Bu's back in singapore for a short holidays of 2weeks. Till now it have been 6days already. Haha, all the peeps have been meeting up quite often especially the Few of us , the mahjong kakis giving mr bu lotsa pocket money to change to ren ming bi to spend wif his new found partner!

I'll get it back!!! soon! haha.

We also had two matches with the refugees last weekend, ended up wif a win and a lost. More significantly was the lost on sunday which ended our unbeaten streak of 7. It matched our last unbeaten streak n seems that mr bu cant be part of the record breaking team for the moment.
I felt very disheartened by the fact that we lost to a team i feel that we shldnt have lost.
All 4 goals are pure mistakes..i aint blaming anyone. but just our luck for that match should be one of our lowest. I felt great with fact that twice i scored and to try to level our scores...but in e end, it was the end result which hit me more than wad i personally achieved as yet, it didnt really matter anything to the team. We still have to face da end of our streak.

Damn it. We'll be better and more prepared for this weekend's coming match.
Mr bu's final b4 he leaves yet again, and Mr guan for his debut match.

Right now, shall go and change as im meeting up wif the peeps for some chilling time at siglap's gelare/coffeeclub. And tml morning shall be my trip to Ho Chi Mingh! hope i'll be back with many pictures to update!

Heads up guys and we shall beat da arse out of any opponents.

Updates

2008-07-31T10:30:00.002+08:00

Up in the morning every day at 9am now. Am i trying to adjust to my next phase of life that's coming in like a mth's time. Nah, I'm not. Just that my maid went back and i have to wake up to feed baobao, walk the dog and later bath for him.

Updates: I am a finally graduate now. I just came back from the durian trip in grandma's place which i brought the whole bunch of peeps back for some kampung lifestyle trial. (Hope each and every one of u enjoyed the simple lifestyle of the countryside.)

I am not feeling good right now. yes. not becoz of what u have said. but wad u failed to understand me.

Turkey he say..

2008-07-13T08:08:00.001+08:00

Pondering what to do..for the less than 2mths of holidays left of what turns to be a change in a phase of my life.

Starting work soon in sept1st. At least two trips have been planned out , hopefully more but im also a little broke.

Right now, just lazing and bumming around on a saturday noon while baby is helping amy and hanhan to do up their nails.
Any ladies who wan beautiful nails at a cheap price pls do just leave a msg! or go to
http://www.w3nnails.blogspot.com/ for a little preview of how your nails can turn out to be!

Had a little chat with ry online just now, haha saw his nick and was like "hopefully a turkey tml"
yeah.hopefully, anyway it simply means that team refugees will aim to maintain a winning streak tml over no.12's frens. Without our guardian angel aka bear in between da post, the lucky one via oh-ah-peh-ah-som shall be unveiled tml with the most undesirable position for most of us.
well, hopefully we'll hit a strike and achieve our turkey tml.
Last post aside, i shall give in my utmost desire and sweat it out tml for the team.

We shall triumph~

out of place

2008-07-07T03:40:00.000+08:00

great comeback with a 0-2 deficit @ht to win it 4-3 at ft.

yes. great play guys. great game. and yes tat nei scored his 2nd hat trick for the team. well done
All played well. except or rather especially me.
I dunno why im feeling this way suddenly. I feel so out of the team. The thought makes me hate myself for thinking this way.

I really have no idea. . .

This feeling sunk deep into me which i dunno how to dispose it.

It hurts.

Im finally back...yeah.. haha

2008-06-28T07:48:00.000+08:00

Yes, finally able to update this Deadblog of mine.

IM BACK~ yes. since last saturday...while awaiting for my sister to send me da hk trip pics, i fell "asleep" till now. -_-"

Anyway it was really an enjoyable trip which lasted for 6days and 5nights! Had a great time there as i was finally able to meet up with baby whom i missed dearly.

Guess the blogging enthusiasm is gone while waiting for my pics, so i guess i'll just post some pics of the hongkong trip. Watch it. As im there with my camwhore sister..as follows is only SOME of the many photos taken on DAY1 ONLY.

First destination. The Peak!

In the train. With 3babes. wootz =)

Way up above the buildings

Wave Pls.

We swapped bf & gf for 5s

The royal Guards =x

They wanted to pose like her. but hm..doesnt look like.

One of baby's fav stars.

Look here Tiger, who's the pro

One of the girl's fav, Andy

Really updated, Beckham in LA jersey

Hey, U think ure the champ already?

Hell no! , u got a challenger!

No way u gonna bully my baby! Im Next!

Shit, 2 of us doesnt work, thanks joy and han fer ure help.

I just got a new disciple in fighting

Way up above the rest, there's us. I miss ya

Till then, lazy to update the rest..............

Much awaited HK trip~

2008-06-16T23:04:00.000+08:00

Finally the much awaited hk trip is here......
Waited fer so many days...

yes! Gonna head to the airport now!
ciaoz! tk care all..

Negative flowing through me.

2008-06-13T23:44:00.000+08:00

Negativity.
Pls to all those out there, do not do what u do not wish ppl to do on you.
Have a sense of responsibility or courtesy, at least give a reply. AND when u do reply yes, and pls stick to it. EVEN if u dont have such responsibility, give a msg to say that u cant make it due to wadever cock and bull story u have.

No more of such stuff , no more sending of smses and calling one by one to confirm if ure coming as there aint anymore organising smses from 97*****8.

RESPONSIBILITY~

my new home aka seaview!

2008-06-11T18:30:00.000+08:00

weee!! just got home from viewing my new place, seaview at parkway.

Its darn nice..for the view at the height of 16th floor.

Facilities wise...got my mum and aunt wah-ing. haha

Tennis courts, jaguzzi pool, gym, a club room wif pool table and mahjong table!

A bball court as well...wow...i really cant wait to start using all these facilities.

Yes hai, now we can go fer our Tennis challenge! wahhahah

and baby...cant wait fer u to step into da place...for the view tat u always yearn for!

hehe

No idea

2008-06-04T23:59:00.000+08:00

i really have no idea what you are thinking about.
Disappoint is an understatement.

miss u brothers..

2008-06-01T21:44:00.000+08:00

my brothers just left and went back to aussie...
Although they have only been back fer less than a week for the funeral...im really glad to be able to see them...
sigh....

all bad stuff are happening to me....y.....
i even twisted my left ankle during the match today n we lost.

wtf issit going on in my life.

Nightmares..

2008-06-01T02:35:00.000+08:00

Headache.
Is it because of the rain which caused it or is it pure headache.

I had a series of nightmare last night which i never had before, woke up in a pool of sweat.
It felt so real that i couldn't get back to sleep.

Right now, i just got back from home from steph's place from mahjonging which my mind wasn't really in the game.(which many says its my favourite) How i wished the game could go on and not ended so early. yeah early as i do not wish to stay in my room alone.

Neither do i dare to close my eyes.
I do not wish to fall asleep. But even if im not asleep. My thoughts wander.

What should i do....what should i do....

Clueless.

2008-05-30T19:50:00.000+08:00

What should i do. Or what can i even do.

I want to talk to someone yet i don't wish to talk to anyone.
I want to speak it out yet i don't think i can ever speak it out.

I just lost a kin of mine. I'm having all the pressure suddenly around me.
Why don't you just take me away.

I have never in my life, felt so pathetically helpless. Never.

Devastated

2008-05-30T16:20:00.000+08:00

Now, GOD pls Send Me to the other world free of sufferings.
Devastated. I can't believe it

Life's cycle

2008-05-30T13:29:00.000+08:00

Life's really short...so learn to really cherish every single one around you...
Action speaks louder than words..so action and not just words.

Just chatted with you online..but it wasnt really a pleasant one.
Know that you are tired..perhaps i should have been more understanding, but perhaps at this time, i couldn't control myself.

Anyway..i just wanna post to say that i really miss you alot. Your Hp aint with you and u just went offline without me able to say much. I wish i could call you.
I wish you were here because a hug and kiss from you right now would make me feel so much much better..

Thinking of you..

take care my dearest grandma..

2008-05-26T14:49:00.000+08:00

After returning to my hp after the blading & cycling session with nei,steph etc..
Seeing many missed calls from my bro's in aussie...i knew something was amiss...

God has taken ure soul away from us.....to a more beautiful world that will spare u from any sufferings ever again.

Upon the news, i was stunned. I felt nothing. Mind was empty.
Till minutes later, trying to hold myself back. I couldn't. I am really going to miss you deeply.
Love you grannie..

finally it rained..

2008-05-22T18:48:00.000+08:00

Finally its raining in sg after several days of scorching sun...

I hate this feeling....sometimes i really wish u can be the cells inside me, knowing what i am thinking at all times.

What i can say is all these days stoning at home has really been bad just like the abominable weather. As before...i'm just looking forwad to the date when i can be "Reunited" with you.

The feelings for you..is just like.
I love my holidays, but now i rather waste the holidays and speed forward time to able to meet up with you..

Trust.

wadever it is. it doesnt help

2008-05-21T22:00:00.000+08:00

once a sinner, no matter wtf u do in the future. it doesnt help. never will it.

Good morning sunshine!~

2008-05-21T08:40:00.000+08:00

Gooddddddd MorNing Sunshine!~

Yes, I am up. As early as 8am in da morning. Feeling really good.. although im down with flu,sorethroat and slight fever. Its good to wake up early in the morning without a doubt.
At least i got to eat an extra meal for the day.haha.

Baby! im up! ha so don't say i always laze till when the sunshine is on my bum. =P
Even though i ain't working/schooling, being up early simply means slacking myself throughout the day rather then sleeping myself through, haha i dun care.

Anyway...tonite's the big match and i cant wait!
Red Devils all e way!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

3Years and 11mths..and going...

2008-05-17T22:46:00.000+08:00

Happy 3Years and 11Mths Anniversary Baby!~

really sad that cant spend this day together with you...

The team, match tat i look forward to eberyweek.

2008-05-16T17:12:00.000+08:00

After victory against SMU
The 2nd most complete team photo(2left and 4joined after)
Good Old Timesss..

Self-declared.. i believe i haf given in eberything i can into this team that i love more than anyone else in the team. I know baby knows that too, although she hates that. ha..sorry baby.

Well, This bond of ours have been together since....2005? i remember vaguely its around end of november 2005. Our first match where we collected our red jersey was at changkat changi secondary school...

Till now...its 3years + ?? People have left...people have joined the team...making now a big family of i say 22players in total. But in reality.. most of them are either down under,cheenaland,germany,us .. ha..sad but will be looking forward to end of the year where all of them will be back! a happy family! =)

Hm.. now ..i believe if anyone ask the team who is the one always stirring up trouble and easily wanna "fight" during matches. They will just point it at me. Yeah. maybe last time, but now i beg to differ. I dunno, i rem zh telling me " ure the stand in captain and u are to control the team". That got into me, and i believe i dun flare up during the matches when i get strong tackles etc. But what i cannot control is when my bro, buddies on the field get "whacked" instead. I dunno why but i cant help but would love to defend fer them.

Be it good or bad. That's what i am on the field.

Anyway baby, i'm not looking forward to the first weekend without you around me.sigh..I don't TGIF for now..coz there aint anything to look forward to.
Miss ya..

Barclay Premier League champions 2007/2008!!!

2008-05-12T02:22:00.000+08:00

RED DEVILS . the best team in da world now~

=)

Really glad for them although there were a few nervy moments which my mum and i was like screaming all over.

Anyway...this is the 2nd day of the life without baby .

Wanted to blog yest nite but couldnt..didnt wanna look at any blogs..tat would remind me of her.sigh...really missed her..

Now im looking forward to the date u'll tell me tat im able to go over and meet u..coz now...there isnt any dates for me to look forward too..yes...steph..at least u got 29th of may to look forward to...sigh.

Went Blading wif baby and sister on thurs nite! my sister was like pestering us to accompany her to ecp to blade...so being a nice bro , complied to her request.

Reached there around 10.30pm? and blade till around 12am~ haha lotsa fun! baby's virgin attempt wif roller blades although she keep saying that she knows how to ice skate.

Fair enough, she was pretty good for a first time blader! hahah holding my hands all e way while blading..while my little sister was complaining abt our slow pace. Lotsa fun! and cant wait to go blading again !

On fri, being the planner fer that nite..duty allocated by mr cute_braces. Organised a dinner at Fish&Co(parkway) and...yeah...the peeps were late!!! except fer steph. haha. Some disappointing facts was that the aircon was down that day! and the staff's services were pretty bad(but yeah..working in a hot and stuffy place will certainly affect their mood so...)

After dinner, we head down to kallang leisure park for bowling! haa. as it was pretty packed, we had to wait and had some fun at the arcade centre! haha. yes! and yes! broke my "personal" record at the bball gamee..going to the 4th stage(normally 2nd stage = gg).

That night was a memorable night for me...for after bowling and returning back home...

Packed some stuff at my place...and we went to her place. That was around 3.30am.

And for the first time.. baby DROVE me back to her place!! Although not bery stable, but still really proud of her! hahah driving all e way from east to the north east! hahahha

Sigh...just cant stop thinking abt her....

logging off..nitex..

Baby at the wheels! *claps*

Cam whoring b4 wrapping up for home after blading

Hand-in-hand, we'll walk down this road together. Loves.

Last moments..

2008-05-10T02:23:00.000+08:00

For the last moments...for the first time. i wish that time would stop right now and tick no further.
While waiting for her to take her shower and to send her back home, i feel lost. totally.

I want to stay strong. i don't want her to be worried. but I'm weak.
I dunno wad i will got to do to hold myself back tml at the airport when i will be all alone outside the departure gate , looking at her back or even looking at her waving at me, saying goodbye.

How hard will that goodbye be. I dunno . and i dun wish to know and experience it.
But as i type, the clock continues to tick wif no mercy.

She's out..and i gotta go...

She Passed!!

2008-05-08T20:41:00.001+08:00

Ringgggggggggggggggggringgggggggg...... Me:"Hellooooo.......hhhhhooowwww...????" Baby: " YeS! i Passed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Baby: " Somemore its the same stupid previous tester, and he say that how come ure driving so gd, that time nv pass?" Lol, contradiction when it was him whu failed baby becoz of some stupid crossing of white line thingy by the BACK wheel of the vehicle. wellwell..I dunno why i feel exhilarated for baby when i heard that. hehe. really happy for u! Loves. signing off...gonna go pick her up... 2more days...sigh.

Singapore Flyer

2008-05-07T13:05:00.000+08:00

As we are not able to spend our anniversary together this mth. Got her a surprise on monday.
Always wanted to get to the top of the SG flyer. Booked a ticket online on sunday and didnt let her noe till monday, where the boarding time is at 7.30pm.

Told her it was my summon ticket when i passed the boarding tickets that i printed out.
Always like to see her expression when i give her surprises. It makes me happy too.

Anyway...after her driving lesson at abt 6+ , went to pick her up b4 we proceed to the destination. Luckily we were able to make it on time..reached there at about 7.20pm.
Oh Ya! Actually..i have a little phobia of heights, but...ha for her..i gathered all my courage to company her and stepped into the huge and spacious "container". Ha i must say i really dun like the experience. okie i hate heights. sianz. while she was enjoying herself! but im really glad that she did. Yes! she's the opposite of me, she loves all the thrills of those rides such as roller coaster,bungee jumping etc. At times, that makes me feel so

After 30mins, the ride was over! ha and we proceed to meet up wif the peeps, Hai,Gerri,Zh,Steph and Nei for dinner at Wisma! And that stupid yl whu didnt wanna join us becoz he said he haf a paper on thurs. But we all agreed that its' becoz of the 11pm match between Chelsea and Newcastle where the former must get all 3points in order to keep up with the Best Team around the world now. Red Devils!

As usual, after dinner..we rambled around without any things to do in mind. After "opening numbers", baby was the chosen one, to pick an activity to do. Between bowling and Mahjonging, the boy whu had to leave for USA for 3weeks on tuesday chose mj. So off we proceeded to Zh's place while Gerri left for home as she had work the next morning.
That night, me hai and nei gave zh a farewell gift..by letting him Yi Jia Ying San Jia through his stupid LAST LAST LAST game's Man Tai Self-touch. haha. well. still okie.lost 2bucks. =P

okie..logging off, going to Vivocity to meet up with Baby~

Days? i cant count.

2008-05-05T01:11:00.000+08:00

6more days to departure.

issit 6? coz i dun seemz to be able to count as the days goes by...
sigh...will it be a sleepless night on saturday? i dunno.

organising a match fer the refugees on sunday..when the ref told me it was 11am game..i told him no..coz i was thinking that u will be around ..but after a second thought..u will be gone by then.

and so many frens are overseas,busy wif examz, busy wif work.
wad shld i do..when the starting date of work is sept1st.
even though i always wish its that late, but now. . . i really wish that i can start work on the day u leave..

Drops of tears.

Speechless

2008-05-01T19:07:00.000+08:00

i dunno y. u got me speechless,motionless. nth seemz to be right
i beckon someone/something to make it right. my life.

letting my thoughts wander about when i dunno wad to pen down.

The highlands

2008-05-01T13:08:00.001+08:00

Back! yup back from the Genting Highlands. Went there wif baby! on monday morning at about 7am..hm..let me recall..

First Day

Stayed up the whole nite on sunday to watch soccer and so as to make myself tired. This is to enable me to be able to sleep myself thru the long journey of 6hrs to our destiny.

Anyway, we chose a more "superior riding tool" called the royal VIP bus. haha. indeed it was really luxurious inside. Holding only about 16seats to make sure that each seat is spacious enuff and comfy. Its equal to the first class air tickets i would say, wif each seat allocated wif a tv of its own and the seats are adjustable to any angle u would like.

Tired enuff, as i got onto the bus, i fell aslp all e way while viewing one of da movie..i think its 300(Spartans!)

After 6hrs of long ride(a stop after 3hrs for makan which i chose to slp instead of getting down. hahah) , we finally reached genting! Its been ages since i last visited this place. haha

The weather was nice. cool and it was really cloudy.(we were literally walking through the clouds) As we went to the counter to check in, something happened. The stupid GRASSLAND AGENCY OVERBOOKED the rooms wif the hotel, and being the unlucky ones to check in last, there were no deluxe(the lousy one) room left for me and baby.

After waiting fer 2hrs+ for the management to get things right, finally we were given the green light to proceed to a World Club room(superior one) to make it up for the waiting time. Charged to the stupid agency of coz.

Anyway, as it was already about 4pm after checking in, we decided to just bum around a shopping mall called the First World Plaza and just play 2 of da rides in the indoor theme park!

Second day

Woke up at about 8am for our breakfast at the hotel's cafeteria. Then, we proceeded to what baby loves the most, the outdoor theme park! But due to the bad weather, many rides were close. We even had to walk in and out of the theme parks due to the weather changes..disappointing it was for baby.

As we had nothing much to do, we went to the patronise the casino! hahaha. My first time stepping into the Genting casino. YES and i lost 150ringgits. Darn. but well. it was really fun. Baby also had her chance at the slot machines.haha 10bucks = 500credits! and lasted her for 1.5hrs! pretty worth it!

Anyway we also caught a late movie at abt 9plus. 一个好爸爸! haha. the movie tickets is really cheap. 10ringgits! = 4+ S$$! and da best is that each ticket comes wif a popcorn,a drink,and a snack(biscuits) ! hahaha..cheap rite?

After da movie we went back to the hotel fer a short nap as it was da most important match to me as a manutd fan this season! MANUTD VS BARCELONA! (1-0 to da devils!!!!!)

I really appreciated that baby was willing to wake up at 2am and company me down to the casino(there were no other places left) to watch da match. Love u! =)

Well alright...a long enuff post. Brighten up this blog wif a few pics!

The view from our hotel room

Its really cloudy, not misty mind u.

My love! =)

Classic! that's a Kbox juke box room!!

Baby in da Lao Ye Che!

Myself!

Stacking up..

2008-04-24T17:34:00.000+08:00

Great defensive work at the Nou Camp..but sadly, ronaldo hafta miss the penalty(darn)

Anyway...lotsa stuff to settle...getting my I/c,License,elevenB, done..and also i just realised i haf a due summon which the stupid inefficient TP department refused to reply to my email to waive the summon. They replied the first email i send , which is an auto reply, stating that they will reply me shortly. Till now its god darn a mth! damn it.

As the due date is on the 27th..i believe i shld go and pay up the summon now. b4 anything serious comes up.Sux!

Just received my date of commencement of work letter. SEPT 1st!!!!! damn it. I'm going to haf a 4mths+ holiz. and wad can i do? nth. stone,slack,slp, STONE. = sianz(my fav quote)
Sent an email to the Hr department..hopefully they are willing to change to an earlier date!

haha anyway went fer a haircut and dye! haha 49% off at any monsoon! do go visit if u want a gd deal fer hair treatments! =)

Pens down, gonna go pack and gonna head to pick up baby from work. Her last day of WORK!

oh ya! nxt mon will be going to genting highlands for 3days 2nights.haha.
but hopefully can get to watch the manutd vs barce clash there!

seul être

2008-04-23T05:44:00.000+08:00

Chanced upon steph's blog and saw her last post. Suddenly, reality came back to me.
What i have been trying to forget and throwing it to the back of my head doesnt seemz to work. Cogitated on the reality that's going to be faced. I cant help sighing..and i dread the ticking of time.

Together fer 3years10mths5days, i guess this will be the longest ever time i will be apart from u..my little precious one.
Its for wad u wan and wad ure pursu-ing..tat's y i cant stop u from going.
If i could, i would really love to join u there everyday and ebery minute..but all ure replies were simply "aiyah i would be too busy learning and work, den u how?" This replies just shut me thru.totally.

I dunno wad to say. i duno wad to do.

On top of tat, my gym/mugging buddy,mr bu is in the cheenaland. and zh's leaving fer US too.
my brothers are in Aussie. The rest are simply too busy.

Alas. . .
Emo to be,Emo shall be.

"Life and love I dwell upon, so beautiful and true; to learn the meaning of forever, and spending it with you."

Over! Final

2008-04-21T13:16:00.000+08:00

mark this date, 21st of april 2008, besides being hai's bdae.
Its the date where i officially end my schooling career!

wahahhahahaha. finally its over. In the blink of an eye, 3years haf passed by.and i haf now become a graduate.wootz.

Now. only waiting fer my letter of confirmation to the starting date to my job in EY. Time to slack and stone. and become a wu ye you ming.

Okie, gonna go get the stuff dat i lost in my wallet for now.

Holiz.
=)

What an "event" to start my blog.

2008-04-19T20:51:00.000+08:00

See how many DOTS ".........................." there are in my blog? tat's how im feeling.

great. Lost my wallet(precious) at my 2nd home for examz. i.e Siglap starbucks.

Too engrosed in the mugging of my final paper of my life.AA304~ audit. I went to the toilet, trying to memorise some crap facts. Leaving my wallet i guess on the table for like less den 3mins.

Didnt notice that my wallet wasnt wif me. I continued mugging till about 6+pm. Happily packing my stuff..about to leave fer home. Ya and i was like " where the hell is my wallet?"

Frantic, i turned the whole table around searching for it. Den i realised its gone.
yes. GONE! my precious wallet my gf bought fer me since 3years+ ago. It really means alot to me, yes despite it being my first "branded" wallet..my first NEOCARD i took wif her. the precious little notes she wrote fer me. yeah..and also the ICs/Driving license,ATM cards,Matriculation Card,ElevenB. many.

yeah, and its like im having my final paper on monday 21st april, without any qualifying Identification shit wif me for the exam. and its already saturday.

Yes. . Wad a way to start my blog. Seriously, im cursing that god darn f**k*R whuever that is whu took my wallet without feeling a Bit of his conscience. Great deal for him.yeah. I bet he will suffer this.

Yeah. now praying if anyone that found my wallet. pls pass back to me! (yeah i bet it will come back)